


Thy Vampyr Squeaketh

by BlueEyedArcher



Series: Modern AU Vampyr (EMT Geoffrey) [1]
Category: Vampyr (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Domestic Fluff, EMT Geoffrey, Fanart, Kitty Ekon Jonathan, M/M, Nervous Habits, Oral Fixation, Slice of Life, Squeaky toys, Teething, cat toys, light banter, they were roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-14
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:47:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24710302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueEyedArcher/pseuds/BlueEyedArcher
Summary: "What are you doing Reid?" The question came from across the table where Geoffrey was perched. The sun had just gone down and Jonathan was taking a moment to read this morning's newspaper while Geoffrey prepared for his night shift. The coffee pot in their shared kitchen rumbled and choked out puffs of steam as it streamed the bitter earthy brew into the awaiting mug beneath the dispenser.He was just sitting down with a light sandwich for the early "morning" that had become their evening routine. Jonathan turned the page of the paper over and hummed thoughtfully."Reading." He answered simply, his prim and proper words stifled by the object held firmly between his teeth. The subtle chirp and squeak made the Irishman stare even more. "The price of gas went up again, Geoffrey. You should fuel up this evening before it jumps again.""That's not what I mean." Geoffrey sighed and wiped his hands clean on a napkin. "I meant what are ya doing with that thing in yer mouth?" He pointed towards the doctor's face where the toy was lodged between his right incisors."It's my stress toy." Jonathan explained simply.
Relationships: Geoffrey McCullum & Jonathan Reid, Geoffrey McCullum/Jonathan Reid
Series: Modern AU Vampyr (EMT Geoffrey) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1984087
Comments: 29
Kudos: 109





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This came from a random conversation we were having in the Pembroke Hospital Vampyr Discord about teething vampires and sensory stimulation. It started as a joke but then, as per my usual style, I decided to write it on the spot last night. So here we are!
> 
> This is for Bigbee from the Discord Server! Your chaotic ideas have inspired me.

"What are you doing Reid?" The question came from across the table where Geoffrey was perched. The sun had just gone down and Jonathan was taking a moment to read this morning's newspaper while Geoffrey prepared for his night shift. The coffee pot in their shared kitchen rumbled and choked out puffs of steam as it streamed the bitter earthy brew into the awaiting mug beneath the dispenser.

Geoffrey was already wearing the clean and fitted uniform that came with working as an EMT for Pembroke Hospital. The sides of his head were freshly shaved, the scent of soap lingered in the air and curled with the lovely aroma of coffee that typically accompanied the man. His hair was still damp where he'd styled it fresh from a shower. There was a slight flush to his skin from the warmth. The rough stubble along his jaw was kept in a tantalizingly short length that still lent to those uniquely roguish features.

He was just sitting down with a light sandwich for the early "morning" that had become their evening routine. Jonathan turned the page of the paper over and hummed thoughtfully.

"Reading." He answered simply, his prim and proper words stifled by the object held firmly between his teeth. The subtle chirp and squeak made the Irishman stare even more. "The price of gas went up again, Geoffrey. You should fuel up this evening before it jumps again."

"That's not what I mean." Geoffrey sighed and wiped his hands clean on a napkin. "I meant what are ya doing with that thing in yer mouth?" He pointed towards the doctor's face where the toy was lodged between his right incisors. Jonathan gave it a squeeze between his teeth and made it squeak obnoxiously loud this time. It was shaped like a mouse with a small squeaker inside that he pressed pointedly with his fangs. It was durable to say the least as the doctor shook the paper and inspected an article about the local high school and the cricket team’s accomplishments this season.

"It's my stress toy." He explained simply. Ever since he became an ekon, the whole ordeal had been immensely stressful as he was forced to change and adapt to his environment as it grew more hostile to his presence. Geoffrey was one of the very few people who was aware of his condition aside from his closest friend Clarence and the administrator at the hospital.

“You know they have stress balls for that.” Geoffrey stated bluntly as he picked at the edge of his sandwich and pulled the crust away with a bored look.

“It’s not as satisfying.” Jonathan admitted. His eyes scanned the paper as he sighed. “Can you pick up some milk on your way home later?”

“Mmhmm.” Geoffrey grunted and took a bite of his sandwich once it was properly de-crusted. “Is it the squeak that makes it so satisfying?” He added as he sat back in his seat with a lazy comfort. “Or is it like a texture thing?”

“A bit of both.” Jonathan admitted as he adjusted the paper and turned the page. He bit the toy again causing it to squeak obnoxiously once more. He had to admit, the sound was incredibly satisfying to hear. Like when one clicks a pen over and over again. That continuous repetition of sound soothed something primitive in his brain and put any anxiety he was feeling at ease. His coworkers at work didn’t appear to share his thoughts on the topic and would glare murderously over their desks at him while he stared a clipboard down with a transport order on it.

Geoffrey narrowed his eyes at the vampire with a scrutinizing look. “Are you teething still?”

“What?” Jonathan sat the newspaper down as he balked, meeting the EMT’s gaze with his own filled with disbelief. “I am not  _ teething. _ ”

“Aye. Ya are.” Geoffrey’s lips twitched into a crooked smile. “You’ve been chewing on everything. Don’t think I don’t know about that pen you broke with your fangs. I saw the ruined shirt in the laundry.”

“That was a mistake.” Jonathan huffed, sitting back in his seat as he hid his frown behind the newspaper. “It could have happened to anyone.” 

“Aye. Anyone who’s teething.” Geoffrey jabbed teasingly before biting into his sandwich again. “You’ve got an oral fixation, Reid.” He said pointedly before popping the last few bites of his food into his mouth and dusted his hands clean over his plate.

“I-” Jonathan started to protest over the paper, setting it on the table with a huff of defeat. “Well, maybe I do. What of it?” He pouted. The doctor would refuse to admit that he was embarrassed by the admission.

Geoffrey strolled into the kitchen to set the plate in the bottom of the sink and turned towards his coffee. He added a spoonful of sugar and stirred it thoroughly before placing the lid on his travel mug with a satisfied smirk. “Nothing. Just curious.” He took a test sip and sighed in approval. “Are your fangs bothering you then?”

Jonathan shook his head as he removed the squeaky toy from his teeth. It was originally meant for felines, kittens specifically but it was just as satisfying for himself as he supposed it was for small kitties. “Not necessarily. Not anymore at least. It just  _ feels good. _ ” He gave a dismissive wave. “My teeth ache without something to chew on and this is one of the few things that calms that feeling. Now it’s more of an urge or an impulse and less of an ache.”

“You’ve developed a nervous habit.” Geoffrey chuckled. It was amusing he supposed. Geoffrey wasn’t exactly a man kind to the vampiric side of life. In fact, he had come across his fair share of victims with bite marks on their bodies from impromptu run ins with these very same nocturnal predators. The EMT has seen more than enough people succumb to the bloody outcome of a rogue vampire’s bite and when he wasn’t saving lives in the back of an ambulance, he was hunting these very same creatures down in the late evenings. It was only by chance that he had come across the doctor shortly after he’d been attacked by an older vampire and, taking pity on the man, he helped him to safety and bandaged him up. He waited for two days, sitting vigilantly over Reid until he turned and helped the doctor overcome his primitive urges.

That was over a year ago, and one hell of a rough year it had been for the both of them. They’ve had more than a few close calls and Jonathan learned to manage his new lifestyle with Geoffrey’s assistance. He had even been able to salvage his career, exchanging his operating room for a Morgue where he studied and investigated the deaths of every patient that passed through his office. Oftentimes working in partnership with the local police to solve potential cases.

Geoffrey and Jonathan have this understanding and arrangement should the doctor step out of line and target humans for any reason at all. The EMT had no problem putting him out of his misery but for now they had figured out how to coexist properly. It wasn’t to say it didn’t have its ups and downs of course. There were a few times that Geoffrey has had to cover for Jonathan or, the one time he had to restrain the ekon because he was so far beyond his thirst that his rational mind had completely checked out and he was clawing at the doors. It wasn’t easy explaining the damage to their landlord but Mr. Hampton seemed understanding in the end.

“I suppose so.” Jonathan scrubbed a hand over his face and glanced towards the newspaper laid out in front of him. It depicted a massive multi-car pile up that happened a few days prior. Geoffrey had been busy rushing victims back and forth to the hospital. By the time Jonathan walked into work, at least three of the bodies had been transported to his morgue to be examined for the cause of death.

“Should I add squeaky toys to your grocery list from now on?” The words were mocking but fond as the EMT stepped towards the refrigerator where he collected his lunch and added it to the cooler bag sitting on the counter. He paused and scowled at the shelf of the fridge with a grunt. “Did you move my energy drink?”

“Those despicable things are horrible for your heart, Geoffrey.” He chided, earning a glower from the Irishman. He sighed. “Bottom shelf. Behind my blood bags.”

“Did you have to hide them behind the blood? It’s feckin nasty.” Geoffrey grumbled. Jonathan met his complaints with the renewed squeaking as he returned the toy between his teeth. His chin cradled in his palm as he stared tiredly towards the empty seat across from him. “What’s got you stressed?”

“I have an inspection later.” He huffed.

“And?” Geoffrey zipped his bag closed and grabbed his coffee as he stalked towards the table to shove the chair back in with his foot. “You always pass with flying colors.”

“Doesn’t make it any less taxing.” Jonathan stated flatly. He melted against the top of the counter and buried his face into his folded arms where he hunched over. “I hate inspections.”

“Who’s performing it?”

“Fergal Bansha.”

“That arsehole?” Geoffrey grimaced. “You’ll be lucky he doesn’t eat you alive.”

“You’re a spectacular boost of confidence, you know that?” Jonathan groaned. It was punctuated by a relentless squeak as he drove his fang into the durable toy. His head perked up when he felt fingers carding through his hair. The Irishman patted his head like he was a fretful feline.

“I try my best.” He chimed. “You worry too much, Reid. Loosen up a bit.”

“Easier said than done.”

“Maybe if you show him your cat toy collection he might take pity on you.” Geoffrey drew away as Jonathan swiped at him. The man cackled in amusement and watched the ekon straighten up and scowl after him.

“Keep it up, Geoffrey and you’ll find an unfortunate addition to your pillow one of these days.”

“If it’s a dead rat, I’ll strangle you myself, Reid.” Geoffrey called as he dug his keys from his pocket and slipped his boots on. He patted his pocket down in search of his phone and double checked for his wallet before heading for the door. “I’ll be back in the morning.”

“Stay safe!” Jonathan called. He was answered with a grunt as the EMT disappeared out the door. The lock clicked into place as Geoffrey locked up after himself. Jonathan remained seated in his chair, surrounded by the empty silence that he steadily filled with the fretful nervous squeaks of the toy subjected to his sharp incisors. The tiny sounds issued a startling amount of calm over his mind that he couldn’t help but worry about more. He supposed he should start getting ready for his own shift but at the same time, he was far too invested in his current activity to move from his spot. He had an hour to burn.


	2. Art by Tyrantwache

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Art of this scene as a "What if Geoffrey took the toy from Reid without permission"
> 
> And it is incredibly cute! Thank you so much for the adorable scene! It looks amazing! And Geoffrey looks so sharp in uniform!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to go give them some love at their Deviantart
> 
> https://www.deviantart.com/tyrantwache/art/Squeak-846168904


End file.
